Tess's apron was still on the hook behind the worktable.
Rachel had left it there after Tess stopped coming. The pocket held a pencil, two pins stuck through a folded piece of paper and a cough sweet whose wrapper had begun to adhere to it. None of those things belonged to a leaving which was finished.
On Sunday morning she took the apron down.
She removed the pins and put them in the cushion. The paper was a measurement note for the blue party dress. Tess's writing slanted more sharply when she was standing up. Rachel remembered her leaning on the counter to write it, customer talking, one shoe lifted behind her because the sole had picked up something sticky.
She put the note in the job folder.
The pencil went in the cup. She threw the sweet away and shook the apron out.
There was also a little pouch Tess kept in the drawer: spare hair clips, a ring she'd taken off to work, a pen with a cloud printed on it. Rachel put that in a clean envelope.
She wrote to Tess.
Your pouch is here. Would you like Ruby to collect or shall I leave somewhere?
The reply came an hour later.
I'll collect. Today?
Rachel looked round the shop before answering. Sunday. Closed. She would have to be here especially, though she was already here because there wasn't anywhere else she wanted to go.
Yes. Any time.
She typed another line, deleted it and put the phone down.
Tess arrived at three with Eli.
Rachel opened the door and stepped back. Tess had a light bag over one shoulder. Eli stayed near the entrance.
“I won't be long,” Tess told him.
“No hurry.”
He looked at the dresses as if they might require him to choose something. Rachel had liked him for that before, his slight unease and willingness to stand in it.
The envelope was on the counter.
“Everything from the drawer.”
“Thanks.”
“And the apron. If you want it.”
Tess looked at the folded fabric.
“You can keep it.”
“All right.”
Tess took the pouch out, found the ring and pushed it onto her finger.
“I thought I'd lost that.”
“No.”
“Good.”
Rachel had been waiting for a useful thing to be enough. The delight at finding the ring was real, and it passed without becoming what she wanted.
“How did the rest of the evening go?”
“Fine. Packed up.”
“I heard the new song.”
Tess's hand paused on the pouch.
“You've changed quite a lot.”
“Had to.”
“It sounded good.”
“Thanks.”
Rachel looked at the grey top folded in the open bag. Tess must have washed it; one edge still looked damp.
“The binding—”
“It's fine.”
“I was only going to say let it dry flat.”
“I know.”
Rachel nodded.
Eli looked through the window.
Tess put the pouch away.
“What time are you leaving?” Rachel asked.
“In the morning.”
“Yes, but—”
Tess looked up.
Rachel stopped before asking where.
Tess said, “I don't want you there.”
The bell above the door moved in a draught and gave a tiny sound.
Rachel had known there would be a no. She'd thought she might be allowed to know the hour, stand at a distance, be somebody on a pavement who didn't ask to be embraced.
“All right.”
“I mean the departure. At Ruby's. Or wherever.”
“Yes.”
“And don't send things.”
Rachel looked at the bag.
“Money. Stuff,” Tess said. “I know how you do it.”
Tess wasn't accusing her of a mystery. She had known the warmth of the bags Rachel produced, food, a new zip, something Tess couldn't afford which Rachel said was spare. Remembering those things made Rachel want to defend them.
She swallowed.
“I won't.”
Tess nodded, not quite believing it yet.
Eli said, “I'll be outside.”
He left them together. It was kinder than Rachel wanted him to be.
Tess stood on the other side of the counter.
Rachel said, “Are you excited?”
“Yes.”
There was something impatient in the answer, and beneath it something guarded. Tess was still protecting the good thing from the woman who might use it.
“I hope you enjoy it.”
“I will.”
Rachel looked at her face. Eighteen, leaving, tired from preparing, alive with the future.
“I miss you,” she said.
Tess's mouth tightened.
Rachel wished she'd kept that one.
“I'm not asking you to do anything with it.”
“You still say it.”
“Yes.”
Tess looked toward the door.
Rachel moved aside.
Tess took a step, then stopped.
“I loved being here,” she said.
Rachel couldn't breathe properly.
“I know.”
“No. I don't want you to make it mean you didn't hurt me.”
“I won't.”
“Because it was good. Some of it.”
Rachel nodded.
Tess's eyes were wet now.
“It's worse because it was.”
“Yes.”
Rachel kept her hands at her sides. She wanted to hold Tess, and she knew Tess would feel the wanting if she moved.
Tess wiped beneath one eye with her thumb.
“Bye.”
“Goodbye, Tess.”
At the door she turned as if there might be one more thing. Rachel waited.
Then Tess went out.
Eli lifted his hand to Rachel through the glass. He fell into step beside Tess, took the bag when she offered it and listened as she began speaking. They turned the corner together.
Rachel closed the door.
On Monday she opened at nine.
She hadn't gone to Ruby's street. She hadn't checked the route or found some reason to walk near where the hire might be collected. At eight she had been upstairs eating toast she could barely swallow while somewhere else Tess began leaving.
Now she switched on the lights and pulled back the fitting curtain.
A woman came in at ten to ask whether the green dress in the window came in a larger size. Rachel fetched it, checked the rail and made a note to order another.
The woman didn't know her. Or knew and didn't care while she needed a dress.
Rachel helped her find the changing room.
Behind the worktable, the hook was empty. The folded apron lay in the drawer, clean and available for work someone might one day do. Rachel hadn't put a new name on it.